Dašcor Čurmey

From Almeopedia

Dašcor Čurmey [ˈdaʃ kor ˈtʃur mɛj] is a contemporary Verdurian philosopher in the Caďinorian pagan tradition. Both his works and his life style outrage many, and he has been imprisoned, or his works banned, more than once.

Life

Čurmey was born in Irvesi in 3442, and attended the University of Verduria. His first book was published while he was still studying. He stopped after receiving his suméria (the basic degree), so that he is not a šriftom (“doctor”), though he's sometimes called one. He tutored students for awhile, though he has since improved this into the story that he supported himself by writing papers for the students “plus some prostitution”.

He is now a full-time writer, though, as he explains, having a few well-heeled admirers helps his cash flow as well. He lives in the Biško.

Fueling the scandals surrounding him, he lives— or claims to live— a life of dissipation: drinking, gambling, having sex with both men and women. His justification or taunt is that he is following the example of the “carefree savages” of Téllinor. All this provides much ammunition to his enemies, though careful observers have noticed that Čurmey thrives on shock, and is by no means the libertine he paints himself as.

Writings

Čurmey is the first philosopher of Eretald to deny the rationality and goodness of the universe. Pointing to the brutality and ignorance of the human world as well as the savagery of nature, he maintains that the realities of human nature are nothing but power, lust, and greed.

His major philosophical works are:

• Prokio dembü soî aďî (“Why the gods exist”), 3463. The title is ironic; the book is an attack on traditional arguments for the existence of the gods.
• Rafát er ranát (“Justice and the entrenched status quo”), 3471. The target here is the idea of divine justice, though there are plenty of jabs at human justice as well.
• Eleď er Iesu (“Eleď and Jesus”), 3473. A short volume arguing that the Union of 2987 was a mistake, that the Almean Eleď has nothing to do with the Iesu preached by the Elenicoi. It was published under the name Šm Acuyo Drerč— an anagram of his name— and written from an assumed Arašei point of view.

The first two of these have provoked a flurry of responses, but also a grudging realization that many old theological arguments were quite weak. Many critics find him arrogant and his arguments a little sloppy, but have to respect his deep knowledge of the philosophers he attacks. The third book is considered more of a broadside than a serious work.

Among the general reading public, he's better known as a ferocious satirist, mostly through his many pieces in journals, newspapers, and pamphlets. His outrageous opinions and his mastery of the language give him a broad and eager readership, especially young noblemen, artists, and journalists; they’ve also led to his troubles with the authorities. There’s almost no group that he hasn't insulted and that hasn’t fought back; he’s been beaten up in the streets, and many have called for him to be put to death.

He has a particularly bitter feud with the Eleďi, whom he ridicules as pompous moralizers, and who consider him living proof of the corruption of Caďinorian religion.

Quotations

“Řo ai ‘abcurayne’. Curaya e sonotá u čuratan itianië šalemeë kaëm akežu ak priloran zicuecî gués carďië telië. Kiam tu deše zovec, tu meta acota curaya. Nikto meve ab curayan.”

“Don’t call me a rationalist. Reason is the fireside dreamings of airy souls protected from meeting reality by the mocking power of others' swords. When someone stops playing, they put away reason. No one acts based on reason.”

“Rašru raveca suleta vetra nočín, ac žanne perece gašul, prokena epnu salďir dy Eleď siča pserne. Kašlelne ab celošán im obiken er ontne ci-ufëan— tot šris, tu ilat ya lelne ne žumbruhecin lië. Perece brugivula. Ac řo dešne pseran.”

“I had sex with a delightful young man last night, but it was entirely spoiled, because I could sense Eleď was watching. He was peeking through a gap in the clouds and he had that face on— you know the one, you’ve seen it on his followers. All twisted up. But he didn’t stop watching.”

“Kiam mizom dy soî avî tam imzolnu ak ktuvoci, cam ocorbum— prokena imseltam dy ca tam fäsrü sankusece pro soin šoruanin zonin. ‘Tam spasiano kaë spasino avom tan’— esanam samsfahî eta kiel řo spasino pirom tan. Ašu dy ontai muďe lon soin aďin prokena řo tan surmetai ce-nasitel.”

“When we say that our gods strengthened us against the ktuvoks, we insult them—because we as much as admit that they recklessly abandoned us during the Dark Years. ‘Save us, you who saved our grandfathers’—we’ll speak no more about how you didn’t save our fathers. I think I’m a lot more pious for not saddling the gods with that.”

“So dalu i Téllinor prose proseam zië perece polne, er tene ďundecpan cirem. Dalu tan iler sënane, iy řo? Samuverát e bekamse e fsëgdá ďalašte, er ftorë žuyora tan doncele muďe fruece An Daluim.”

“The king of Téllinor goes about entirely naked, and has twenty-five wives. Shouldn’t ours give it a try? Nudity is comfortable and never goes out of style; and the second would have given us an heir a lot sooner.”

(Eta Evar šoh i Pelym) “Fuáy e dy tence yela; ac so altmuyo šenne.”

(On Evar, duke of Pelym) “He had a thought once, but the crisis passed.”